I can’t remember ever arriving at my grandmother Hazel’s home in Ringgold, Virginia, and not seeing a beautifully dressed table in her dining room. After our initial hugs and hellos, she’d lead my sister and me in to see her latest entertaining masterpiece. And in true Southern fashion, every detail had a story. The linens were often embroidered by a dear friend or family member, that month’s china pattern would inspire her to share a memory of my great grandmother, and the glasses might be on loan from her sister who lives next door. Her tables were usually centered around a theme and no holiday was too small to take center stage.

Like many Southerners with a little experience under their belts, she didn’t shudder at the unexpected ring of her door bell. Friends, family, and neighbors were always welcome to sit down for a chat, and usually invited to stay for dinner, too. Whether or not you plan to keep your china out seven days a week, here are a few lessons I think we can all learn from my family’s white-haired matriarch:

In the South, you never know who might stop by for a visit

Drop-in visits are a common occurrence in the South, especially around the holiday season. Rather than driving up your heart-rate with last-minute preparations, find little ways that make you feel ready for guests. A styled dining room gave my grandmother’s entire home a festive glow, but keeping a two-ingredient appetizer or house cocktail on hand might be more your style. When Susan from bible study brings a surcie to your front door, you’ll be prepared to welcome her with open (relaxed!) arms.

From the linens to the crystal, our homewares are often sentimental

In this region, we start collecting entertaining staples at a young age. Whether you received a single piece of silver for every birthday since you’ve been born or a great aunt gifted you a beloved family tureen as a graduation present, our most precious heirlooms have stories worth more than their price tags. No matter the size or the value, these treasures are often the best conversation starters for any meal. Small talk isn’t necessary when a passed-down china pattern inspires fits of laughter over party mishaps from years gone by.

Grandmothers’ wisdom dictates that you don’t wait for a special occasion to use your finest

Life’s too short to leave your crystal in the cabinet collecting dust. Yes, these heirlooms are special and the potential for chips and cracks might prevent you from pulling them out on a weekly basis. But isn’t the thought of a lifetime locked away even worse? Whether it’s every family birthday, monthly anniversaries, or Friday night suppers, choose regular occasions to pull out your best tableware. Enlist a loved one to help with proper cleaning and storage techniques at the end of the night (dishes were always my grandfather’s responsibility) and take off some of the pressure of keeping these sets in pristine condition. The more you use your punch bowl, the more stories you’ll have to share as you use it in the years ahead.